Early To Bed

I go to bed early
Hoping sleep will rescue me
From the banal idiocy
And false accusations
That are my every evening

I squeeze my eyes shut fast
Hoping to grind to a halt
Or at least quickly slow
My mind’s whirling frustration

Trying to force, suck, pull,
The covers over my minds eye
Cursing how I’ve wasted
More of life’s precious moments

I pray, even though
I don’t believe in a god
And never find
Any peace in my dreams

That tonight, blessed sleep
Comes painlessly
And it does
After only pulling away twice
And without medication

But as you are now witness
It sneaks back away too soon
Like the sea
Before an undeniably deadly tsunami

Unexpectedly and completely
Exposing the raw floor
With its litter and shells
And spiny urchins

Leaving me cursing loudly
And fleeing frantically
Failing miserably
And flailing against
The false security blanket
I was desperately hoping
Would rock me
For enough hours
At least somewhat gently
Until the morning ship
could came in
And I’d be rescued to sail away

Escaping to the island
of my daily insanity
So preferable to this
Horror of banal idiocy and
False accusations
That is my every evening

~ cj. 2010.12.27 12:08am

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