I Matter

It only took me a minute or two on the 17th to write Existing. I suppose it was ready to be said without much hesitation.

But after I was done, I waffled back and forth for quite awhile before and after I posted it, trying to decide whether to use the word ‘exist’ as the core concept, or the word ‘matter’. And I’ve been thinking about it ever since.

So here’s the piece again, only I’ve changed a few words so the core concept is ‘matter’. I made this new version, because existing and mattering are different. I made this new version, because mattering is more important to me.

I Matter
***************
You treated me
as if who I truly was
didn’t matter
so completely
that who I truly was
stopped mattering
when I was with you.

When I left,
you still treated me
as if I didn’t matter
so completely
that I found a way
to matter to myself
instead.

And now,
all that you meant to me
when I was with you
has stopped mattering.

~ cj 2013.08.20

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7 Responses to I Matter

  1. Steve says:

    It seems this poem means/says a lot about you. Much better imo. The end.

  2. Lori says:

    I totally get it. Very nice.

  3. Morine says:

    I love the sense of validation I get from you with these changes. This expresses your personal growth much better than the original version. 🙂

    • cjromb says:

      I agree with you, Morine. The first version felt like a stranger on stranger piece. That’s true as well, but mattering is really what we want, not just existing. Thx as always for reading. <3

  4. Christine says:

    I agree. I like this one better.

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