Each Moment

Each moment you’re alive, you have the opportunity to take a step. Sometimes the best you can do is a baby step. Other times, it’s a leap of faith. And without knowing it’s coming, once in awhile you step off a cliff. Sometimes the steps will seem forward. Other times, you’ll find yourself falling painfully, uncontrollably back. You’ll want to flail and try to catch yourself. You can’t control it all, so don’t. Pull your arms in, my friend, breathe into the fall, and watch.

Each moment can be a trial, or a triumph. You will win, you will lose, and sometimes it’s hard to tell the difference. But each moment you show up, you have the opportunity to play. Smile into your trials, and be gracious in your triumphant moments.

Each moment is a gift of some kind, even when the gift isn’t obvious in that moment. The gift of pain from a burn is learning not to touch what will likely seer your hand, or your heart. Practice sitting in those moments when you don’t think you can be still one more moment. You’ll gather strength, you’ll build resilience, you’ll wash the ache out of your soul with your tears. And most importantly, if you’re looking for it, you’ll find the gift.

Each moment is one step closer to breaking free of your suffocating cocoon. Oh, I know the unbelievable exhaustion that will overcome you as you beat your wings against your captors, real and imagined. But you cannot fly unless you work through the bone-weary tired to build your life on the other side of this challenge.

Each moment is new, and uncharted. You’ll get lost so many times, you’ll believe there is no way back home. You’ll want to give up a million times between now, and what will eventually come after this brutal storm has run its course. It’s okay to get drenched, it’s okay to be blown into the wall or tossed about at sea. Don’t worry if you feel lost. You will find your way, and when you are too weary to travel, it’s okay to sit with your back to the world in a corner while you gather what you need to stand up and move on.

Each moment is a chance to give yourself the love you’ve always wanted. Shine your light, be yourself, hold it dear, insist on being treated and treating yourself with respect. Cherish the heart, the mind, the beauty that is uniquely yours, no matter who else has told you that you don’t deserve it, including yourself. Stand up, stand strong and turn your back on anyone who puts you down or makes you ache.

Each moment is a precious chance to connect. Use those connections to learn, grow, move beyond what has been in the past. Your friends, your true friends, will love you through this journey. You will find that some who are part of your life now will not be part of it later. Learn when to hang on, learn when to fight, and be ready to let go many bittersweet times between now and who you’re about to become.

Each moment you can give love to yourself, and to others. You may find the heart that is right for yours at the other side of this heartbreak. Or you may find that the best heart for you is simply your own. Don’t stop yourself from giving and receiving love. And don’t discount the gift of loving yourself. You are with you longer than any other in this life of yours. And you will be rewarded by yourself and others for treating yourself well.

Each moment will find you experiencing things you’ve longed for and been terrified of. No matter what is in store for you, my sweet friend, as you begin this journey, remember each moment is only and always yours.

And most of all, don’t ever give up on your moments. They are all that you have to hold onto as you move towards the beautiful, inspiring life that is yours, if you make the most you can of each moment.

~ cj 2011.12.26