Tag Archives: heartache

The Magic is Gone

my breath catches behind the rising lump in my throat choking off all my best words, leaving them stuck and flailing for air. I am helpless to do anything but blurt and stammer and spit out the few that remain. … Continue reading

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The Miracle of Healing

I have to look quite closely now to find the seam where you carelessly cut me to the bone. You cracked me wide open, letting my guts spill out, exposed to your toxic dirt. Still hungry to hurt me, your … Continue reading

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Protected: I Hate These Moments

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Bleeding Freedom

I picked at myself, mercilessly digging ragged nails deep into my flesh, an endless cycle of scratches and scabs and scars. I needed something, anything, to dig into me deeper than you did. I made everything bleed, little places, small … Continue reading

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Existing

You treated me as if who I truly was didn’t exist so completely that who I truly was stopped existing when I was with you. When I left, you still treated me as if I didn’t exist so completely that … Continue reading

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Until Tomorrow, Whippoorwill

The whippoorwill trills over and over in the night lonely, looking waiting for her to call back to him. Sometimes he hears her and they sing for awhile. Sometimes he gives up and goes to sleep until tomorrow. We used … Continue reading

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Stone, Stone Cold

Today is the first day I’ve written on stone paper. I find it cool to the touch and beautifully soft as I caress its pages with my fingers and press my pen into filling its lines. It is also the … Continue reading

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Opposites Attract

it hurts my heart less, …when we’re not connected… it hurts your life more. ~ cj 2013.04.02 Bookmark on Delicious Digg this post Recommend on Facebook share via Reddit Share with Stumblers Tweet about it Subscribe to the comments on … Continue reading

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Matter Of Time

“Oh, my, you two are so perfectly suited”, was her frankly astute observation, as if she’d discovered some treasure, as if she were the first who found it inevitably, painfully obvious. and then, as if she couldn’t help but continue, … Continue reading

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Symbiosis

I write because I can’t draw in a breath without shattering my heart unless I do. You ache because it catches your breath in your chest and shatters your heart when I do. ~ cj 2013.03.27 Symbiosis: the living together … Continue reading

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I Imagined We’d Dance

I’ve closed my eyes so many times since I found you again imagining if we walked softly and waited til the timing was right, we’d one day sink sweetly, breathing into the rhythm of dancing together again. I’d trust you … Continue reading

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Complete Silence

Complete silence surrounds me, so loud I can hear your absence like a pin that hit the floor, and reverberated without warning, expanding quickly in my empty echo chamber, until it became a requiem filling a symphony hall, at the … Continue reading

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Sometimes

Sometimes the joke isn’t witty enough and the laughter isn’t nearly raucous enough to cover up the hurt lurking beneath, crouching for safety in the shadows of a silky sheer grin. And Sometimes it takes only the tiniest whisper from … Continue reading

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Pulling Up The Covers

when I first slept alone again after so many  years next to you, my broken heart  insisted I quickly  make the bed  the moment I  woke each morning, so I wouldn’t hurt each time through my bedroom  noticing how  perfectly your side … Continue reading

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I’m Not Going Anywhere

“I’m not going anywhere” you’d said, while you extracted yourself from the wreckage, wanting space between you and the painful rift you’d ruthlessly, thoughtlessly, carelessly caused between us. “I’m not going anywhere”, you’d said, but then, unable to resist, you … Continue reading

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Tomorrow

Tomorrow is a sad one year anniversary for me. I made a choice because I couldn’t take the pain anymore. One year ago tomorrow was the day my husband and I stopped living together after more than 23 years. I’ve … Continue reading

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