Category Archives: MM

The Miracle of Healing

I have to look quite closely now to find the seam where you carelessly cut me to the bone. You cracked me wide open, letting my guts spill out, exposed to your toxic dirt. Still hungry to hurt me, your … Continue reading

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Never Ever

No one gets to treat me like you did, again, and over again. Not even, especially not, never, ever again, you. ~ cj 2015.02.18 Bookmark on Delicious Digg this post Recommend on Facebook share via Reddit Share with Stumblers Tweet … Continue reading

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Be Safe

Oh my heart’s dearest pain, no need to worry, I’m safer here, running far, driving fast, going where I’ve never been, and don’t yet know the way. I’m safer here on my own, worlds away from where you try to … Continue reading

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Leaving Limbo

This was never Limbo to me, and as my heart heals, I discover the will to refuse that lie of a label I let you use far too long to describe how you left me holding and hanging while I … Continue reading

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Tender

you cannot cut and cut and cut, again and over again, feasting without regard, and then expect to come back and find more tender meat to filet from my raw naked bones. ~ cj 2014.11.25 Bookmark on Delicious Digg this … Continue reading

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Still Stuck Sitting Still

so many things we could have said, I could have said. so many ideas for how to get through this moment. and yet, we are still here, I am still here, still sitting here, here sitting still, still stuck and … Continue reading

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I Am

Take Care, he wrote. I am, I replied. Finally, I am, I thought. Finally, starting now, I hope I am. Then, I added Thank you. I added it but I don’t know why. Perhaps it will be a final tip … Continue reading

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Disregarded Matter

There are two kinds of people who don’t matter enough to themselves. One of them gives a whole heart away without regard to the cost. The other treats that person’s heart with the same disregard. What a pain-filled matter love … Continue reading

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The Same Sky

You are alive, growing, a leaf, a branch, a ring at a time, stubbornly rooted in an earth of your choosing. I see now that I was but a colorful streak of dusk-time fun splaying and twisting through the same … Continue reading

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A Moment

a moment when a thing was said and another was felt time stopped so an ear could hear and an eye could see so a heart could open firmly and fully and let what is true in that moment and … Continue reading

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A Longer Moment

a moment a moment when a thing was said when a thing was said and another was felt when a thing was said and another was felt time stopped time stopped so an ear could hear time stopped and an … Continue reading

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Chasmic Canyon

“I promise, I’ll be more present soon. And thank you for your angelic grace and undying patience.” His words barely reached me anymore, less and less urgent each time they echoed across the chasmic canyon gaping impossibly between he and … Continue reading

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Opposites Attract

it hurts my heart less, …when we’re not connected… it hurts your life more. ~ cj 2013.04.02 Bookmark on Delicious Digg this post Recommend on Facebook share via Reddit Share with Stumblers Tweet about it Subscribe to the comments on … Continue reading

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Matter Of Time

“Oh, my, you two are so perfectly suited”, was her frankly astute observation, as if she’d discovered some treasure, as if she were the first who found it inevitably, painfully obvious. and then, as if she couldn’t help but continue, … Continue reading

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Symbiosis

I write because I can’t draw in a breath without shattering my heart unless I do. You ache because it catches your breath in your chest and shatters your heart when I do. ~ cj 2013.03.27 Symbiosis: the living together … Continue reading

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I Write

I write because I can’t see I can’t think I can’t sleep I can’t draw in a breath without shattering my heart unless I do. You ache because I speak my truth I make you think I wake you up … Continue reading

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I Imagined We’d Dance

I’ve closed my eyes so many times since I found you again imagining if we walked softly and waited til the timing was right, we’d one day sink sweetly, breathing into the rhythm of dancing together again. I’d trust you … Continue reading

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Let’s Not

Let’s not and pretend that we did, because my heart still bleeds from the last time, when I gave my all and you only pretended you did. ~ cj 2013.03.05 Bookmark on Delicious Digg this post Recommend on Facebook share … Continue reading

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Sweet Sunday Snoozes

Sweet Sunday snoozes breathing each others air wrapped in a cocoon of blankets and plumped up pillows, wrapped in each others arms. I inhaled deeply and turned every way I could while you tried to dream, making sure each part … Continue reading

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Where You Are

You sent me a picture from where you are now. I know it so well it brings tears to my eyes. It’s that treasured place where we both used to be when we believed we always would and where we … Continue reading

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Next To Me

Next to Me – Piano Solo by Me I love one little part of this. It comes up over and over. Can you hear it? It’s the pause where you look up from your book and smile, because finally, beautifully, … Continue reading

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You Built

you built these walls because you want, but not badly enough to want to climb your own walls. ~ cj 2012.10.31 Bookmark on Delicious Digg this post Recommend on Facebook share via Reddit Share with Stumblers Tweet about it Subscribe … Continue reading

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Welcome

I knocked on your door believing I wanted to drop something off, give you a neatly wrapped up, you-mattered-to-me package, let you know there were no hard feelings on my side of the fence, and if you needed me to … Continue reading

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Vacations Over, What A Trip

Before I left, things weren’t right and I could scarcely wait to go, But while I was gone I lost my way, and the memory of what compelled my journey. Vacation tends to trip my mind It sends me places … Continue reading

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Delete

Something’s crawling up my skin from my toes to my scalp A noise Making the hair rise on my arms The blood rush loud in my ears My heart hammer out of its cage Creeping, choking, confining me With horror, … Continue reading

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Lonely

You are lonely. I am lonely. And we stay lonely. Who made that rule Who holds us there? Do we get a reward for this suffering? Or have we, by staying lonely created a space between Where a callous can … Continue reading

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Impossibly Far

Impossibly far from here we’re eating breakfast together eggs, mine covered in cheese, yours? I’m having steak, and you, local sausage. In common, too, we have cold and even a bit of snow My honey is pollenated by flowers far … Continue reading

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Feather

like a feather gently swirling over a cliff free floating white and graceful twirling from where it was to where it’s pulled by gravity by nature by aching and joy inevitable and peaceful dangling and lifting swelling and swirling spinning … Continue reading

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Who Will?

You held me crying my heart out from losing my love. who will hold me now crying my heart out from losing your love. ~ cj Bookmark on Delicious Digg this post Recommend on Facebook share via Reddit Share with … Continue reading

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No Thank You, I’ll Pass

walk away stop step back go leave resist can’t do hang on not yet do without restrain wait don’t mean put off not ready drop back de-escalate later no thank you i’ll pass. ~ cj 2011.01.07 Bookmark on Delicious Digg … Continue reading

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